Do you practise feedback 3.0?

“I can imagine how nerve wracking it must have been to give me constructive feedback, and I genuinely appreciate you using your energy and courage to help me with your honest feedback. I wouldn’t have known those things had you not told me."

How often have you heard someone say this after you gave them negative/constructive feedback?

I usually say this to people who give me negative constructive feedback because more often than not, it is nerve wracking to give someone negative constructive feedback.

I can be intimidating, or I used to be anyway, and I know how much courage can be required of someone who's not used to give negative feedback to others to give me negative feedback.

Giving constructive or negative feedback to someone who has authority over you or who is very confident, can be scary.

Many confident people are confident on the surface but they buckle when given negative feedback and can become very reactive or aggressive.

To my mind, it's like this:

~ Feedback skills 1.0 - knowing how to deliver negative feedback

~ Feedback skills 2.0 - knowing how to receive negative feedback

~ Feedback skills 3.0 - having the self awareness, self esteem and self assuredness to appreciate just how hard it must have been for that person to muster the courage to give you negative feedback. This is the ultimate empathy.

What do you think?

Do you prefer to hear negative feedback or would you prefer people keep it to themselves?

#feedback #leadership skills